Tuesday's Takeaway

If you know me well, you know that I love to read. I buy books every time I go to Lifeway...more books than I have time to read. I rarely read a book that I completely dislike. I am not overly critical of books. I feel like I learn something every time I read a book. God speaks to me through books. Yes, He speaks to me through His Word and through music, but I always walk away from books feeling like I heard something from Him loud and clear.

I've picked this book up several times. I think I actually had it in my bookstore basket at one point, but put it back. This is so not like me. If I even think I'm interested in reading a book, I buy it and then I pass it along to someone else knowing that I may never get it back. It doesn't do me any good just sitting on a shelf and I have plenty that are just sitting on the shelf. Derek sometimes wants to clean out our bookshelves because he's neat and tidy like that, but I always think that I might run into someone who needs that book or I just might read it again.

Anyway, I decided not to buy the book. Why, I don't really know. But my sis-in-law got it for me for Christmas. Perfect gift because it was a great read and I finished it today. I cried through several chapters, but it's worth the read. The Chapmans have an incredible story of God's grace, but one thing I learned is that God is in the small details. There is no way that so many details of their lives were just "coincidence". We serve a sovereign God who is involved in the intimate details of our lives. This book reminded me of that. It reminded me that I should cherish each day more because our days are numbered by a sovereign God. It reminded me that my husband truly is a gift and my children are too, even though some days they drive me crazy...just being honest!

But most of all, it was a reminder to me of how loving our God is. There are so many quotes in this book worth holding onto, but the one that grabbed my heart the most was by Hudson Taylor. He says, "May this be your experience; may you feel that the Hand which inflicts the wound supplies the balm and that He who has emptied your heart has filled the void with Himself."

The Beginning of Disney 2010

We've driven to Disney the last 5 years. This year we decided to fly. Stephen and Matthew have been on a plane with their Papa as pilot. Elizabeth has never been. We talked about it and everyone seemed excited about the first big plane ride.

And then a winter storm came and the kids got out of school early and our flight was almost canceled, but we made it out just in time. They de-iced the plane and Elizabeth wondered about this. Matthew proceeded to tell her all the things that could go wrong that might make the plane crash. Elizabeth was very concerned about the "captain of this ship" and would he know how to drive "the ship". She didn't like the take off...tears would come...and I would have to show some mercy and compassion. I really needed some medication for me and for Elizabeth to calm us both. I don't have any fear of flying and so I have no idea how to comfort someone who does. I very well might have done a lousy job!

We didn't get to Orlando until about 11:00 or so because of delays and it was 1 am by the time we made it to the hotel. Everyone was tired and cranky and just wanted to be in the bed. So, let me tell you at 1 am in the morning, the services at Disney resorts are limited. We were all thirsty, but the stores are all closed as well as the food court. I think there were a total of 2 employees working the massive resort at 1 am in the morning.

They showed us how to get to our room on the map, but obviously Derek and I don't follow directions well at 1 am with 5 pieces of luggage and three very tired and cranky kids. We took the scenic route around the resort in probably 32 degree weather pulling the luggage behind us. When we finally made it to our room, we all just fell into the bed. No teeth brushing or anything...shocker, I know! We had to get up early because Magic Kingdom was waiting....

I am telling you that this trip would've made for some good reality tv. And this is only the beginning....

If You're Waiting for a Christmas Card From Us....

it'll have to wait until 2011.

The week before Thanksgiving, I decided to remove some things off my "to do" list for December. I honestly think that we couldn't fit anything else into our December even if we tried...we're going on vacation, going on a mission trip, celebrating a birthday, selling a van, buying a new camera (stressful), shopping for Christmas, celebrating Christmas, going to Christmas parties, and the list goes on and on. I decided that sending Christmas cards was going to stress me out, so I crossed it off my list. Done! And now when I receive all the beautiful pictures and Christmas cards in the mail, I think, "What was I thinking?" But I will not pick up something that I decided to not do this year. I am opting out and not caving to peer pressure. And so, here's all you get.

Merry Christmas!! May your 2011 be incredibly blessed with abundant blessings from our Lord and Savior! We are so thankful for our three blessings that are growing up entirely too fast!



AND

Merry Christmas! May your 2011 be full of all kinds of laughter and joy. This is just a glimpse into the "reality show" of our lives. "Oh, are we having pictures done? I thought we were just here to be silly!"

More Sweet Kisses

Thanksgiving...so much to be thankful for. My list could go on and on, but the week of Thanksgiving brought a lot of sweet kisses this year.

Sweet kisses...unexpected blessings from God. He sends them probably every day, but we don't always see them. This week I feel like I saw them more clearly. They came in the form of...
-a sweet note from one of my children's birth relatives
-a hug from my three year old nephew...just because
-friendship...wow, too many to name here...some are lifelong friends, some are new friends, some are co-workers, some are former co-workers, but all of them are just precious and I am incredibly blessed
my kids making a big deal out of my birthday, even when I don't think it's that big of a deal!
-family...some by blood, some by marriage...all of them are lots of fun and all of them give me great blog material which you will probably never read...just because some things stay in the family
-and Thanksgiving morning, my birthday, I got the sweetest and most encouraging note from one of my children's birth moms. I wish I could share it, but it's private and precious. I read it early Thanksgiving morning on my phone and it brought tears to my eyes. Tears because she gave me a most precious gift, her sweet and precious child and only by God's design plan and the power of His love could I receive such an encouraging note from her a decade later.

But our God is an amazing God who showers us with sweet kisses all the time. Sometimes we miss them, sometimes we see them clearly. When we see clearly, then we see just a glimpse of our most precious Savior. The same Jesus that died on the cross for my sins is interceding on my behalf and He's asking our Heavenly Father to shower me with blessings...with sweet kisses. What an incredible and amazing God. I hope you don't miss Him today and that you feel a sweet kiss straight from the hands of our Lord.

A Bleeding Heart

I cried my way through a book called "It's Not Okay With Me" by Janine Maxwell. On the back of the book it says, "This book is not for the faint of heart." and it's really not. I cried through the book and then cried at night and then cried on the way to work. And if you know me well, you know that I'm not always a cry baby. But the evil in this world...the evil that is done to children, wow...it ripped at my heart. My heart bleeds and may never be the same, but that is okay with me. I've prayed for God to give me His heart. I think He gave me just a tiny glimpse and it hurts. How deeply grieved our Heavenly Father must be as He looks at the evil in this world.

Why would I read a book that is so heart wrenching and gives details about the atrocities done to children? Because it reminds me that as Christians we need to do something. Instead of getting distracted by the cares of this world that have no eternal value, we need to bring hope to the hopeless. We need to bring Christ to those who have never heard. We need to be the mother and father to these children that tragically lost their parents because of AIDS or malaria or starvation.

I don't know what that looks like in your life or mine. I'm not about to tell you what it looks like. I'm on a journey (I guess my family is on a journey) and I don't know the final destination. I know part of it is going as often as possible. Part of it is working for an organization that sends teams to be the hands and feet of Jesus (Check us out--Visiting Orphans) Part of it is paying for Yasen to go to school in Ethiopia. Part of it is paying for Sandra to have proper care at an orphanage in Nicaragua. Part of it is giving to great organizations that provide mosquito nets and water and food to those desperately in need. Part of it is praying. Praying for those we sponsor and praying for those that I don't even know who are just about to lose hope. Praying for the girls that are being abused today. Praying for the little ones that are watching their mother die. Praying for the girl that is willing to sell herself just so she has some food to eat today. Lord, I beg you to intervene on their behalf. How selfish my prayers have been focusing on myself and things that really don't matter in comparison to these tragedies.

And so, I've decided after reading this book that it's not okay with me. The evil in this world makes me angry. I have a holy frustration...a frustration that I can't forget, that I won't forget and that is determined to do something...for one child, for two, for three...whatever it takes...whatever that looks like in my life.

Janine talks about how we can become overwhelmed by the numbers, but giving one hope is enough if that's what God is calling you to do. "If it's not enough, then do more. If you can't do more, then stop making yourself crazy."

And I stand in agreement with Janine that this would be my message to those in Africa "It's not okay with me anymore that your children are dying in front of you from hunger, and that you are naked and that your husband died of AIDS. It is just not okay with me! And I am going to do something about it."

What about you?

Seeking Approval

So it's been an interesting couple of weeks around our house. I have been listening to a sermon series on family. I quickly realized that I still have much to learn when it comes to parenting and probably life in general for that matter.

One of the messages was entitled "blessing" and it references John Trent's and Gary Smalley's book called The Blessing. It talks about how everyone desires "the blessing" from their parents and others. I stink at "giving blessing". Words of affirmation...not my love language in the least. And so God gave me at least one child possibly two, that crave "words of affirmation". Isn't that just like God to make my life a little difficult? To give me children who don't think like me and don't receive love in the same way that I do. I can buy you some gifts like you wouldn't believe. I can serve up some acts of service...if you need words of affirmation...I'm terrible...in both written and verbal form, I flat out don't have that gift.

Deep down, I have a people pleaser mentality. Most people probably do. I want my kids to like me and my friends to like me and just people in general to like me. But sometimes God calls us to do difficult things which might in fact make people not like me. My children would probably like to hit the dislike button at least once a day. Parenting is tough. It's not for the faint of heart...especially if your kids are 10, 9 and 8 and very opinionated. God had me camping out on this verse the other morning.
Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10
I tried to push it out of my mind, but He just kept putting it in there over and over again until I submitted and agreed that I am a servant of Christ and that means that I shouldn't seek the approval of men.

And then the test came....I went to the kids' school on Thursday for their Thanksgiving lunch. Elizabeth was so excited to have me there. Matthew was excited to have me there. Stephen not so much. He gave me a little wave as he was getting in line for lunch. He picked up his lunch and then disappeared. I didn't know where he had gone. I had saved him a seat to sit by Matthew and me. He was nowhere in the cafeteria to be found. He was gone. I debated...do I go find him or do I just leave it alone? I really thought that no matter what decision I made, it'd be the wrong one. He's probably complain about whatever I decided to do. I asked my friends Jerry and Leigh..what do you think? Jerry gave me some wise words, he said, "You let it ride. Right now he doesn't care that you're here, but in 20 years, he'll remember that you were" And so I left it alone and Stephen didn't say anything about it when he got in the van that day. I asked him why he didn't sit by me and he told me that he wanted to sit with his friends. I could've given the lecture about how he gets to sit with his friends every day and that I took time out of my day to come and have lunch with him. Didn't he know that I had other things I could be doing....blah, blah, blah. But I didn't, I just said okay. My feelings were hurt ... just a tiny bit. I have some pretty thick skin, but it was a reminder of two things

1. I shouldn't be seeking the approval of man (my kids)
2. Stephen is growing up....ugh, that one is hard to write.

I love him just as much even though he didn't want to have Thanksgiving lunch with me.

Orphans, Disney and Dentists

I went to the dentist yesterday and had to have two fillings replaced. Fun times! I haven't had any dental work done since I was probably 10 or 11 years old. I am so thankful for a great dentist. He was gentle and kind and while he was numbing my mouth, he started talking about Disney. If you know me well, you know that I love to talk some Disney. Turns out we'll actually be there at the same time this year, but he told me about some yummy foods that I have obviously been missing when I go to Disney. I will be trying them this year!

And while he was working in my mouth and there was absolutely no way for me to talk, he starts talking about Sunday being Orphan Sunday and how his pastor taught on orphans and adoption and so on and so on. He tells me that he's thought about adoption more than he ever had after that sermon and how the church needs to rise up and take some ownership of all the orphans (143 million) in the world. I read a statistic that if only 7% of Christians would adopt, there wouldn't be any orphans left in the world. Obviously, some orphans aren't available for adoption...I understand that, but the statistic is still staggering. Doing something does make a difference!

The craziest thing though was being in that chair and not being able to say anything. I was about to come out of my skin because obviously I have lots of thoughts on orphans, adoption and missions. And I thought as I left that so many times, the enemy has us in that exact position where we remain silent--whether by choice or because of fear or because of circumstance.

Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute.
Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.
Proverbs 31:8-9