Hope in the Midst of Despair

We visited one orphanage that didn't allow pictures. Of all the orphanages we visited, this one needed to allow pictures. These precious children need homes and I would love to advocate for help for this place (however, it's not what they want right now). There are probably about 140 children at this home and it's simply survival at this place. Some places have a real sense of family and the kids look out for one another. That is not how I would describe this place. When I was there in May, the toddlers were kicking and pushing and spitting and hitting and throwing chairs across the room. Anger and hurt was everywhere. It broke my heart. It was almost more than I could take.

And in June, I spent more time in the baby rooms. There were probably 25-30 babies under 3 months old in one room. Two to a bed and itty bitty babies, two that were very malnourished. The majority of these babies have been abandoned and were brought to this place by the police. I don't understand it all and the system doesn't always seem to make sense. But this is the only hope for these children. And honestly the nannies are doing the very best that they can. But I think there were only 2-3 nannies for this room and you just can't consistently feed 25-30 babies with 3 people.

The older baby room had 30-35 babies most likely and I only stayed in there for about 5 minutes. The smell was more than I could handle. I tend to have a sensitive nose, but with each trip to Africa, the smells bother me less and less. But that room, I just thought I might pass out because of the smell. I knew I couldn't stay. But God calls everyone to something different and several of the team members stayed in that room and helped feed the children oatmeal.

And there was one little boy that captured my heart. He seemed like a healthy 12-18 month old, but he was in the newborn baby room. I asked why. They said that he had just recently been abandoned. I carried him around for awhile (he was a chunk) and then I'd try to put him down, but he'd cry. And he was so stinking cute, so I'd pick him up again and carry him around some more. One of the nannies said, "You take him to America". I told her that it's not that easy. If it was easy, I would've brought him home. The nanny told one of the other team members that this boy needed to go to America because he cried a lot except for when he was being held. I can only imagine why he cries and what has happened that such a cute little boy who laughs so easily cries except when he's being held. Don't we just all long to be loved by someone. I asked his name...they didn't know. But God knows his name.

And then the girls....oh my....statistics say that over half of these girls will be abused or have been abused. The injustice of it all. One very young girl who came couldn't walk because she had been abused. Another child was being burned by a family member. The heartache and the tragedy, only God can bring healing to these hurting hearts.

It was a lot to take in. Words cannot accurately describe what we saw. And even if we had pictures, I don't think they would help either. Children just starving for attention and acceptance. Children longing for a forever family whether that's reunification with their birth family or placement with an adoptive family. Statistics show though that the majority will just end up living in an orphanage for the rest of their lives.

And so all I know to do is to keep going and to keep telling them that Jesus loves them and that God has a plan for their life. And hopefully some seeds will be planted in their hearts and they will have big dreams for their lives and their families and they will become future leaders of their country. Only God can do that! But I know that God brings beauty from ashes and that what someone else meant for evil, God can use for good. I have to stand on the promises of His Word.

"I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living." Psalm 27:13