Seeking Approval

So it's been an interesting couple of weeks around our house. I have been listening to a sermon series on family. I quickly realized that I still have much to learn when it comes to parenting and probably life in general for that matter.

One of the messages was entitled "blessing" and it references John Trent's and Gary Smalley's book called The Blessing. It talks about how everyone desires "the blessing" from their parents and others. I stink at "giving blessing". Words of affirmation...not my love language in the least. And so God gave me at least one child possibly two, that crave "words of affirmation". Isn't that just like God to make my life a little difficult? To give me children who don't think like me and don't receive love in the same way that I do. I can buy you some gifts like you wouldn't believe. I can serve up some acts of service...if you need words of affirmation...I'm terrible...in both written and verbal form, I flat out don't have that gift.

Deep down, I have a people pleaser mentality. Most people probably do. I want my kids to like me and my friends to like me and just people in general to like me. But sometimes God calls us to do difficult things which might in fact make people not like me. My children would probably like to hit the dislike button at least once a day. Parenting is tough. It's not for the faint of heart...especially if your kids are 10, 9 and 8 and very opinionated. God had me camping out on this verse the other morning.
Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10
I tried to push it out of my mind, but He just kept putting it in there over and over again until I submitted and agreed that I am a servant of Christ and that means that I shouldn't seek the approval of men.

And then the test came....I went to the kids' school on Thursday for their Thanksgiving lunch. Elizabeth was so excited to have me there. Matthew was excited to have me there. Stephen not so much. He gave me a little wave as he was getting in line for lunch. He picked up his lunch and then disappeared. I didn't know where he had gone. I had saved him a seat to sit by Matthew and me. He was nowhere in the cafeteria to be found. He was gone. I debated...do I go find him or do I just leave it alone? I really thought that no matter what decision I made, it'd be the wrong one. He's probably complain about whatever I decided to do. I asked my friends Jerry and Leigh..what do you think? Jerry gave me some wise words, he said, "You let it ride. Right now he doesn't care that you're here, but in 20 years, he'll remember that you were" And so I left it alone and Stephen didn't say anything about it when he got in the van that day. I asked him why he didn't sit by me and he told me that he wanted to sit with his friends. I could've given the lecture about how he gets to sit with his friends every day and that I took time out of my day to come and have lunch with him. Didn't he know that I had other things I could be doing....blah, blah, blah. But I didn't, I just said okay. My feelings were hurt ... just a tiny bit. I have some pretty thick skin, but it was a reminder of two things

1. I shouldn't be seeking the approval of man (my kids)
2. Stephen is growing up....ugh, that one is hard to write.

I love him just as much even though he didn't want to have Thanksgiving lunch with me.

Orphans, Disney and Dentists

I went to the dentist yesterday and had to have two fillings replaced. Fun times! I haven't had any dental work done since I was probably 10 or 11 years old. I am so thankful for a great dentist. He was gentle and kind and while he was numbing my mouth, he started talking about Disney. If you know me well, you know that I love to talk some Disney. Turns out we'll actually be there at the same time this year, but he told me about some yummy foods that I have obviously been missing when I go to Disney. I will be trying them this year!

And while he was working in my mouth and there was absolutely no way for me to talk, he starts talking about Sunday being Orphan Sunday and how his pastor taught on orphans and adoption and so on and so on. He tells me that he's thought about adoption more than he ever had after that sermon and how the church needs to rise up and take some ownership of all the orphans (143 million) in the world. I read a statistic that if only 7% of Christians would adopt, there wouldn't be any orphans left in the world. Obviously, some orphans aren't available for adoption...I understand that, but the statistic is still staggering. Doing something does make a difference!

The craziest thing though was being in that chair and not being able to say anything. I was about to come out of my skin because obviously I have lots of thoughts on orphans, adoption and missions. And I thought as I left that so many times, the enemy has us in that exact position where we remain silent--whether by choice or because of fear or because of circumstance.

Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute.
Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.
Proverbs 31:8-9

Orphan Sunday -- Can You Help?

To whom much is given, much is required. It's not original with me, but I use it all the time because I think Americans are incredibly blessed and that we'll be held accountable for what we do or don't do with our money. What can you give up this month to provide basic supplies for these children in need. Could you give up a meal out, a new pair of shoes, a new camera (this is what I want!). Read the post below and pray about what you can give to buy towels, clothes and necessities for some of the sweetest and most precious children on earth.

Repost from Sumer:

I still so clearly remember standing in the trash dump on January 7th of this year. I remember the smells, the noises, the exact spot where I stood, and the names of all the people standing around me. I remember God so clearly saying, “This is it, this is where I would be if I still walked the Earth, and this is where I want you to be.”

And then later as I walked into my room, and saw the outline of her sunglasses on Angela’s ash covered face, I remembered the prophetic words of Isaiah…“Bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes.”

I had two boys in mind to begin the journey, a beautiful young girl had captured the heart of my friend Tabby, and another guy on our trip was partial to an older boy. And so it began, we were going to move 4 kids out of the trash dump. I don’t know how it happened, I have no good explanation other than divine intervention, but word started to spread and we started to get people committing to sponsor other children.

My initial hope was for 100 kids. But for a long time that seemed like an unattainable goal.

And when we got in a new set of profiles that almost doubled our initial list I started to worry, but thankfully the plan was not dependent on me…God had a plan and I was just along for the ride.

And as you all know, 9 months after my first trip to the trash dump on Ethiopian Christmas day, we moved 250 kids to a boarding school in the beautiful countryside.

We have had some growing pains, and faced a steep learning curve. About running a ministry, and dealing with the local culture. A major bump in the road was when the school informed us two weeks before school started that the cost of yearly tuition had increased by over $100. Now initially that took the cost of tuition alone up over the amount of the sponsorship, and I again started to get very worried.

Thankfully, we serve the One who calms the storm with a word, and the very next week the value of the local currency changed in favor of the dollar and we were back to the original amount! Not good for the local economy, but good for us.

And we have learned that one or two outfits is not nearly enough. Their clothes are constantly dirty and wearing out quickly. They do wear their uniforms to school, but only during school hours, and then they wear their personal clothes. The children all need more clothes.

Nonetheless, along with the blessing of 250 kids, comes the strain of the getting them their necessary supplies. Our teams have paid thousands of dollars in excess baggage to take over clothes, shoes, and school supplies. We will continue to pack shoes over because the quality of shoes in America is so much better, and we are so grateful for the donations of shoes that we receive from Soles for Jesus.

We have decided that it is best to buy their other necessities such as clothing, toiletries, and school supplies in their local community. Usually the items are cheaper, it supports the local economy, it saves us money in baggage fees, and it opens space for sponsors to keep sending fun packages and letters and for teams to bring over other necessary items such as medical supplies.

Therefore, we are asking for monetary donations to purchase more clothing, toiletries, and school items for the children. We are hoping to get every child another pair of pants or a skirt, and two more t-shirts. They each also need a towel, and we will continue to buy body soap, laundry soap, notebooks, and pencils for the children every two months.

All donations will go 100% to the needs of the sponsored children at the boarding school, and all donations are tax-deductible. Please mail donations to:

Project 61 PO Box 126 Thompson Station, TN 37179

Or if you are a member of my home church, you can make out your check to Project 61 and place it in the offering on Sunday morning.

It's Not Enough

I spent my Saturday with some amazing people who love orphans and who love Visiting Orphans. Some are old friends, some are new friends, but all have a passion for the Lord and for the fatherless. We all want to see hope brought to the hopeless. To see healing brought to the brokenhearted. To see the invisible God become visible.

And as I sat there with tears in my eyes, just overwhelmed by the evil of this world, I was reminded once again that God catches our tears in a bottle (Psalm 56:8). That verse first came to life as we faced infertility and then a miscarriage. The tears that come when someone has hurt us or when we realize that we've hurt another. The tears that come when we say good-bye to someone we love dearly either because of death or because God's calling them to another state or another country.

But as my tears fall, I have all the comforts of America. A comfy bed, a comfy house, plenty of food, plenty of clothes to keep me warm, clean water, a hot shower, and I am surrounded by sweet and precious friends and family. But what about those who don't have this...not just the bed and house and clean water. What about those who have no one? Who spend their nights on the street? Or those who have no one because they're not willing to share their story because it hurts to much and so they just keep quiet and perhaps without others knowing, they are slowly dying inside.

Our job is to make an invisible God visible. Our call is to be His hands and feet. Our call is to go to the fatherless and to those who need hope and love. They need to hear about a God who is with them in the good times and the bad.

Whatever you're doing...it's not enough. I'm not doing enough, you're not doing enough. We are only given one life. Let's make every day count. Today is the day. Do something kind for someone in need or someone who is hurting either on your street or across the world.

I say it often, but it's the truth. It's in the Bible. To whom much is given, much is required.

I Don't Want To!

It sounds like something my kids would say, but instead it's a conversation that I've been having with the Lord for the last couple of days. A little temper tantrum that I've been throwing for a couple of days. It doesn't change the Lord's mind. I'm still called to do what he's asked me to do and I'll do it, but I want to pout a little just like Jonah. The book of Jonah...talking about people who are different than us and reaching out to those very people. Loving those people that we don't like...maybe they've hurt us, maybe they're just different, but God still calls us to love them.

And in my flesh, I want to like everyone and I want everyone to like me, but let's face it, that's not real life. And so when Sonja posed the question in class about "do we have to like everyone?"...it was a good question and one that I've thought about for hours now. I don't have to like them. I just have to love them and show that love to them whether I like them or not. Easier to type than to actually do.

And so...I'm going to obey...no need to delay....I don't think the ship to Tarshish is leaving anytime soon and the thought of a terrible storm on a ship, then being thrown overboard, then being in the belly of a whale for several days...well, I just think obeying God the first time is easier.

What about you? Who's in your life that's difficult to love? Or who are you supposed to reach out to and show Christ's love because you may be just the person God is sending?

God is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and of great kindness (Jonah 4:2). You may be just the one to deliver that message to someone today. Don't delay!

Interrupted

I'll admit it. I don't like interruptions. I like a schedule and I think everyone should keep to a schedule, but that is not real life. So I should've known that when I started a Bible study called Jonah -- Navigating a Life Interrupted, that life wouldn't be smooth sailing and go on as scheduled. Sometimes God chooses to interrupt the regularly scheduled programming...Priscilla Shirer calls these divine interventions.

So, life was pretty normal last week. I had my list of errands to run on Friday and we had a full and fun Saturday planned for the kids. And then about 10:30 Friday morning the school called, Matthew's in the office with a stomachache, headache, sore throat and he just threw up. We think he has strep. Please come get him.

And so, we head to the doctor. He has a severe ear infection in his right ear. Severe people. They start questioning me, when did this start, how long has he been complaining about pain and on and on. He has no fever. He hasn't once said that he didn't feel well. Even in the office, he's saying, my ear does not hurt. So they didn't even test for strep because his throat wasn't that red and the treatment is the same.

So we head home with the antibiotic. We get one dose in him and he gets sick again all over the kitchen floor. (I know you're thrilled to be reading these details). Our family rarely gets sick so when we do, we're pathetic. I still keep thinking, this is all related to the ear infection, etc. By Friday night, he's feeling great. He's on the Wii Fit for an hour and off to bed. At about 2 in the morning, I realized that this wasn't all related to the ear infection, that he did have a stomach virus on top of his ear infection, because this virus decided to visit me!

I climbed out of bed and headed to the downstairs couch. I spent some time just sleeping on the bathroom floor because I knew what was coming and my body just hurt too much to move from the couch to the bathroom. I was irritated because our Saturday was ruined and I felt crummy. I wanted to die. I know that sounds extreme, but I really am a huge wimp when it comes to pain. I don't know how a stomach in pain can affect your whole body like it does, but my entire body just ached.

And that's when the interruption hit, God reminded me of Africa. He reminded me to be thankful that I had a bathroom and a warm blanket as I lay on the couch shivering. He reminded me that I had access to stomach medicine and ibuprofen and crackers and sprite to help ease all the effects of this. He reminded me that I had a loving husband who still took the kids on part of our fun day even though I stayed at home in the bed. He reminded me that there are women all over the world...widows or just lonely women...who don't have someone else to take care of their children when they're sick. They don't have access to medicine or comfort and I wonder why. Why am I so blessed? Why are they not? And how ungrateful that I am that I can't endure 24 hours of suffering when they're enduring suffering day after day after day. And God reminded me to be loving and compassionate and to do whatever I can to help these women and children who are so vulnerable. He reminded me that He loves them as much as He loves me. He sees them in their distress. He has not forgotten them. He will not forsake them. He loves them with an everlasting love. And if I can't do anything else, I can go whenever I have the opportunity and tell them this.

Too Much of a Good Thing

I'll admit it. We are Fox News Junkies although our lives have been so busy lately, that we rarely ever watch Fox News. I just might be going through withdrawal.

You know that maybe you watch too much political TV when your 10 year old puts a sign on his door which tells you to knock before entering, but then at the bottom of the paper it says,

I am Stephen Jordan and I approve this message!

It made me laugh and smile and miss Fox News all at the same time!