We Weren't a Compassion Team

This breaks all the rules of motherhood, but I am actually a very heavy sleeper at night. Derek was the one who always heard the babies first and usually he's the one that still hears the kids if someone is up in the middle of the night.

But there is one sound that will make me spring out of the bed like no other. It is the sound of someone vomiting. I do not know why this is the only noise that gets me out of the bed, perhaps it's because I personally despise vomiting (not sure that anyone likes it), but I will fight like crazy to keep from vomiting. Usually when I have the stomach virus, I am on the bathroom floor pleading with God to just let me die.

So, we're sitting at dinner at Hotel Bethlehem in Ethiopia having a conversation about how this team has only one team member with mercy and compassion and that is Carrie. The rest of us, we're really not that nice. I guess we mostly believe that what doesn't kill you will just make you stronger. We were discussing who would be compassionate if we were sick, etc. and the answer was always Carrie....no one else including Sumer ever made the list.

It's about 1:30 in the morning and Angela and I are both asleep when I hear that sound....someone a few doors down is vomiting. (Side note: in Ethiopia two unmarried people are not allowed to share a bed, so Angela and I were technically breaking the law by sleeping in a bed together). We had to get separate rooms because of this law, but Angela and I ended up in the same room (this is a blog post for another day). In the midst of all that, we gave our room to Bryan and Jonathan because they had a room with two twin beds and this way they each had their own room. All of that to say that I only knew what room Carrie was in and what room Sumer was in....the boys, I wasn't so sure.

So, I wake up Angela and say "someone's throwing up". I don't know what I expected her to do, but I said, "What if it's Bryan?" It was his first time in Africa and I did feel some responsibility to make sure that he had a good time and made it home alive. So, I start walking down the gravel pathway trying to figure out which room the vomiting is coming from. It's not Carrie, it's not Sumer. I'm not sure which room Bryan or Jonathan or Maste and Haptamu are in. I finally end up outside someone's room and I'm whispering, "Bryan....Jonathan..." No answer. The vomiting stops for a little while. We head back to bed and I continue to hear the vomiting. I walked the gravel pathway again, but wasn't didn't want to start waking up random people if it wasn't coming from their room, so I just headed back to bed defeated. I couldn't go back to sleep and I just prayed and prayed for that person because I just know how horrible food poisoning can be.

I then started thinking that I had the same thing to eat as Bryan, so my tummy starts to hurt. I pray some more. Finally around 3 am I go back to sleep. It was fun conversation the following morning at breakfast when I realized that no one on our team was sick and instead I was outside someone else's room yelling "Jonathan...Bryan..." Whoever that person was, they got lots of prayer that Sunday evening in Ethiopia. And the team, we laughed a lot about it.

Two Metal Smiles

Stephen and I are very different, but even though at times we seem to be polar opposites, we definitely have a few similarities. 1. We both could just live off of sweets. Eat dessert first is our motto. 2. We both like silly movies. We cackle together and obviously have the same sense of humor even though the rest of the family may not think it's funny. 3. And for the next year and a half, we'll be in braces together. And since, there has to be a good side to even braces, we decided to have ice cream together afterwards. Because after all, dessert can just about make all things better.

Worth the Investment

Derek and I are celebrating 18 years of marriage this month. We have never gone to a marriage conference until last month. I'm not sure why we never did. I guess life wasn't too hard when it was just the two of us. I heard the other day that if you think you have it all together, have children and they will ruin that. For sure. I think having a 2 yr. old, a 1 yr. old and a newborn just about did us in. We could barely handle the three little ones, so I think we felt bad even asking anyone else to keep them for us.

Anyway, we decided to check out Family Life's Weekend to Remember. They have one in Franklin in May, but we had a conflict that weekend, so we decided to drive to Destin for the weekend a few weeks back. It was amazing for several reasons.

1. It was a lot of fun to spend time just talking without being interrupted. :)
2. I love the beach and the Lord always refreshes my spirit when I spend time at the beach. There is something about the sunshine, the sand, the ocean and eating our meals outside that renews my spirit.
3. It was good to hear the speakers talk about family relationships, conflict, etc. It forced us to talk about things besides our schedules, the bills and our children. It was fun to just talk, laugh and dream together. It truly felt like an extended date night for us.

I'd encourage you to check it out. It's worth the investment of money and time because you want your marriage to last. Your children will be thankful (someday) that they were in a home where the parents deeply loved one another. It takes work to stay in love...it won't just happen.

Check it out. If you enter TSCMarriage, you can attend as a couple for $159 compared to the regular price of $318. (Hotel and food is separate). The code should work for any of the events around the country over the next year.

Weekend To Remember

Matthew and The Frist

Matthew was one of two students chosen from his grade to have his artwork displayed at The Frist Center. He was so very excited that his artwork would be on display. He made it very clear that it wasn't a painting, it was a chalk drawing. When I asked him what he painted (that's when he clarified that it wasn't a painting!), he told me it was a self-portrait. Of course, it was. If you know Matthew well, you know that he is one confident boy.

And so we headed to the Frist to see his artwork displayed.



While there, we saw our nephew who also was chosen to have his artwork displayed.




And then this is my contribution of artwork. I think this girl is absolutely beautiful!

Stares and Smells

A few weeks ago I asked Matthew if he was ready to go to school, his reply, "Yes! And I look awesome." So of course when he came home, I asked him if everyone thought he looked awesome and he said, "Yes, they were staring at me all day."

That boy is not lacking in confidence! He then goes on to tell me that there are two other girls in his class that like him. Just so you know, one already wrote him a note and asked when he was going to kiss her. (They are in 4th grade!!!!!! I wanted to call up that little girl and her mother and tell her that Matthew isn't allowed to kiss until he's at least 21, so why was she asking?) Matthew goes on to tell us that every time he looks at these girls in class, they are looking at him and they just smile. It kind of makes me laugh and then makes me nauseous all at the same time.

This conversation then transitions to Stephen telling me that when he wears deodorant (glad he at least occasionally wears it), that a certain girl leans over in class and smells him and tells him he smells good. Matthew then informs me that there are 9 girls that like Stephen.

Lovely....just lovely...where did the time go? It seems like just yesterday girls were gross and disgusting. Now girls are staring at and smelling my boys.

Help!! The preschool years don't seem like they were that difficult after all.

Elizabeth's Second Best Day

Derek took Elizabeth to a father daughter dance at our church on Friday night. Elizabeth was a little nervous (the unknown always worries her a bit). But she came home beaming from ear to ear. She told us that it was her second best day ever. Her first is a day that her and Derek went bike riding without me or the boys. I am happy that this little girl loves her daddy so much!

A Valentine Worth Remembering

Summer 1990...I had just returned from being an exchange student in Germany for a year. My parents had changed churches while I was gone and this was the first Sunday I had been to the new church. I met Derek that Sunday...I don't remember how, but we met. (Just a side note, my dad and Derek had been church ushers together, but Dad never mentioned to Derek that he had a daughter.)

For me, it was instant attraction, but he was established in his career and I was leaving for college in the fall (we are 6 years apart in age). And so, we became friends and hung out some together along with the other singles at our church.

I left for college and ended up getting engaged to a great guy. Problem was....we fought like cats and dogs. He really was a good Christian guy, but the two of us together were not a good mix. We called off the wedding just 6 days before we were to get married. I think God rescued us from each other. He is now happily married and I am so thankful that God intervened and led us to different spouses.

I was supposed to marry the other guy in May 1993. We called it off, he moved to Michigan and we tried to work things out. In September of 93 we just realized that it wasn't going to work. Our personalities were not good for each other. There were lots of hard feelings and drama and all that you might expect, but God taught me so much through all of this.

Derek and I had our first date in October of 1993. (My dad had mentioned several times that I needed to date someone like Derek, but girls just can't call and ask for a date). We went to dinner and a movie (Rudy...remember that one?). Anyway, poor Derek is all I have to say. I had about 25 questions and he probably thought I was a crazy woman. Honestly though, I was thinking, if this isn't going to work, then let's just figure that out early on and move on. But it did work and Derek can make me laugh like no one else. He is funny and silly and sarcastic and we just clicked.

February 1994...I think we were celebrating Valentine's Day at a restaurant....you think I would remember these things, but I think all my brain cells and memories vanished when we decided to have 3 kids under 3 years old. Anyway, I had an opportunity to move to Germany in the summer. We just started talking about our future together, etc. and next thing I knew, we were getting married. I don't think either one of us planned that conversation that night, it just happened. You get two practical people together and I guess they just put a plan together and decide to get married. We told my parents the next day and I think it's probably one of the only times that I've ever seen my dad speechless (in a good way, I think). We planned to get married in September 1994, but we decided to have a simple wedding and get married in April 1994.

And so in less than a year's time, I was engaged, called off a wedding and then married someone else. And let me just say, I got the better end of this deal. Derek is calm and patient...I am not. Derek rarely says a bad thing about anyone...let me just say, I wish I had that quality. Derek thinks things through...I just jump in and do damage control afterwards. Derek likes things neat and tidy...I am messy and cluttered. Derek loves unconditionally even when I am stubborn.

I think our story is just a reminder that God has plans and they are so much better than our plans. He works in mysterious ways, but He is trustworthy. And this February, 18 years later from that first Valentine, I am so glad that I met a church usher the summer of 1990. Who knew all that God had in store? I am so thankful that God writes the storyline of my life and not me!